Luna Sea [L-R]: J, Shinya, Ryu, Inoran, Sugizo
This is the first fanfiction I had ever attempted to write. I've decided to post it here since I wanted to have another purpose for this blog. This fanfic, after all, is a part of me. This is what started me into writing. I've made lots of friends because of fanfiction writing. Though initially, it was all because of the fandom, I eventually had friends who saw me as Shiira Megumi, the friend, and not just Shiira Megumi, the fanfic writer.
This piece was inspired by the J-rock band Luna Sea [these guys here] and it is, by far, the only Luna Sea fic I wrote. What followed was a string of Glay fanfiction.
You would also have to forgive me for the way I write. I never considered myself as a very good writer. My only purpose in writing--at least during my fanfic-writing days--was to make my friends happy.
I haven't written anything lately. I hope posting my fics here would help me get back on my writing.
====================
Losing Her
Shiira Megumi
Today my heart thumped loudly from within my chest, much wilder than it did before any of the sold-out concerts I've given out with my band-my former band. Nothing I've done in the past could have prepared me for this moment. Sure, the idea might have crossed my mind a few times before, but nothing beats reality. And reality is here, slapping my face, tormenting me along with mixed emotions already swimming in my head and heart.
I knocked on the door and her faint yet sweet voice came muffled from inside. I took one deep breath before I turned the knob to let myself in.
Her face lit up as soon as she saw my reflection on the mirror. With a smile, she got up from the dresser chair and spins around to meet my eyes. "Well...how do I look?"
I smiled, beaming. "Like the gorgeous girl you've always been." It was a simple line yet it took all of my guts to say it. I almost even choked on it. Gorgeous was putting it simply. She is so beautiful it's far beyond words. She was dressed in a white off-shoulder number of satin, tulle, and beads, the princess-cut bodice hugging her shapely torso, the full skirt making her appear like a heroine out of the fairy tale book she'd always been fond of reading. The diamond-studded tiara sitting daintily atop her head proved it.
I stifled a chuckle as I remembered when I'd worn a similar albeit unimpressive dress a few years back during one of our concerts, way before I even met her. Had she seen me then, she probably would've laughed me off the stage. After all, I was then already in my late twenties, at the time when I basked in the long peak of my career as lead guitarist of Luna Sea, the greatest rock band of my time. My life then had simply consisted of four elements: music, alcohol, nicotine, and women. I let the smirk triumph over me. I've come a long way since I've met her, haven't I?
Then again, maybe she wouldn't laugh at me silly. She'd always been understanding of everything I did. In fact, it's one of the things I dearly loved about her. How can anyone not feel the same way?
Her face broke into a sly grin. "Hey, you don't look half-bad yourself."
Trust her to always be the first to notice any effort I put into making myself look good, not that I had to exert a lot of it. I had on a white tux ensemble, complete with equally immaculate white leather dress shoes. My hair I wore short and simple and free of any color. It had been that way for years now. I guess I look...normal. Hn, it's one of her favorite words.
"Well, I must not look any worse," I retorted with a playful lift of a brow. "I can't let you have all the attention now, can I? I am the rock star after all."
"Was," she corrected.
The signature bitchy expression on my face wore off to be replaced by a thoughtful, serious smile. "Yes, that's right."
"You don't regret it, do you?"
"No. I still miss it though, to be honest. I mean, it is the band that I've lived for. Bur regret is out of the question. You know I did it for you."
"I never asked you to give it up."
"I know." And it was true. Not once did she demand for me to choose between her and my career. If she had been just any woman, I would've blatantly chosen the band right at her face. But that's not what she is. Besides, the breakup had been a mutual agreement between me and the guys. We've had our moments. It was just agreed that all of us should take time out to attend to the important people that matter in our life more than trying to please others. After all, we've all spent half of our lives doing just that.
She looked down at the floor for a moment. "I almost forgot. Isn't it bad luck for you to see me before the ceremonies."
"I'm not your groom." Those were the hardest words I've ever given out. It was as outright as saying I've lost her.
"I think I'm gonna cry."
"Then cry." Deep inside, I honestly think I should be the one to do just that. She isn't the one about to lose the most important person in her life.
"I'm just deliriously glad. This is the happiest moment of my life."
"Mine, too."
Soft brown eyes regarded me in surprise. "Really?"
"I'm happy if you're happy. You know that."
She nodded with a sniff, I noticed. "Well, I guess it's time to see if this mascara really is waterproof, ne? I shall see you outside then?"
I expelled another puff of air. "Actually, there's something I need to give you before you go out there." I strode towards her, stopping just a few inches away from her. I pulled out a rectangular blue velvet box from my back pocket and handed it to her.
Her eyes grew wide. "This is so beautiful!" she cried, taking the gold necklace from its case. A gloved hand smoothed the huge sapphire pendant hanging elegantly from the chain. "Thank you so much."
"It's nothing." I took the jewelry from her hands and she faced her back to me so I could clasp the chain around her neck. "You know," I began, recalling the speech I've long been practicing before my bathroom mirror, "I don't think I've ever told you how much you mean to me."
"You have," she said. "Lost of times before...when we were together."
"Maybe, but did you know how much I've meant ever single word I've uttered?" I inhaled deeply to cover up the beginnings of nasal drips caused by impending tears and I caught the faint scent of jasmine wafting from behind her ears. I love her wearing that scent.
She didn't say a word and I took it as my cue to go on. "Ever since I've met you, you've become the center of my life. I never thought I could get to feel a love as special as the one I felt with you, but you made it all possible. Since then, everything that I did, I've always done with you on my mind. When Luna Sea broke up, I felt sad and hurt, but in a way I was glad and relieved. I knew it meant spending more time with you. I wanted to be with you at all times, to be there when you need me and even when you don't. I wanted to make up for when I weren't there because I had my career. And at this point, before you march down there and into the arms of the man you've chosen, I just wanted you to know that you are the most important person in my life, and that I love you very, very much. And I'm not saying all these to ask you not to...not to walk down that aisle. I'm just...stating a difficulty."
She spun around to face me, her eyes brimming with tears threatening to fall at any given moment. I would love to see them trickle down her pretty face but a knock came at the door I've stupidly left open.
"There you guys are! We've been searching all over for you," a middle-aged but still suave-looking Ryuichi exclaimed by the doorway. Bless him, always right on time. "You ready?"
"Yes," I replied. I threw her a hurried glance. "I'll see you outside." Then I quickly headed for my way out without waiting for her response. I guess I was afraid of what she'd say. She's young, only twenty-two, but she'd never feared to say what was in her heart. I may be more than twice her age, and I've yet to feel as comfortable spilling out whatever I keep, although that did change somehow a few years back.
To be honest, a lot of things did change about me when I met her. When all I cared about was my stereotypical rock star status, she came into my life and, as Ryuichi himself said, I've been different since. For the better. I used to be so selfish, thinking there was nothing more important to me but myself and the band. But I changed after I realized I was crazy about her. She'd changed me without meaning to. She just simply had to be there.
But after today has gone, she's going to change my life all over again, almost as she'd alter hers. She still has her whole life ahead of her, a new one. I, however, could not bear to think life without her, if I could still call it life at all. I'm about to lose the woman I've ever loved as much. How could anyone call that living?
I poked my head inside the cathedral to see everybody settled into his seat. Almost all of the guests had arrived and I can't help but smile. Things sure changed a lot after about two decades. My friends and former bandmates were all present at the left side of the chapel. Inoran was seated comfortably in the second row beside his pretty wife and their equally good-looking youngest son. J, still the self-avowed bachelor, was in the same row, murmuring something to his current flame, a former commercial model. Shinya looked as healthy as he was during our last concert, his wife absent for a CM shoot in Europe. Ryuichi was by the window and busy chatting up with the members of the new band he was producing.
Other noted people were present as well, famous almost at the same time we were. The man partly responsible for our fame as Luna Sea, Yoshiki was seated at the back beside a pretty blonde with a noticeable huge diamond solitaire on her left middle finger. So he had finally broken his pledge of bachelorhood...after twenty-five years! A gentle laugh diverted my gaze to the right side of the chapel where the members of L'Arc~en~Ciel were, their frontman Hyde as good-looking as a man as ever. I think their band had lasted the longest among their contemporaries, one of which included mine, although Haido had taken on a lot of solo projects a few years after he got married. Luna Sea weren't in speaking terms with Laruku before, but time had definitely mellowed down the rivalry. I smirked as I saw their bassist smile. Tetsu seemed like wine, getting better with age. I seemed to remember he looked handsomer today than he did the last time I saw him, which was always the case.
The members of Glay were here, too, not that it's a shocker. Jiro was seated at the second row, right side, along with his pregnant yet still beautiful wife. In three months, she'll be going into her fifth labor. Hisashi-chatting with Jiro believe it or not-has taken on a more masculine appearance since Glay made their final bow years before L'Arc~en~Ciel did. He came with his wife-his second after a nasty divorce from his first. She had recently given birth to their second child, a daughter who's an exact image of Hisashi. Takuro, on the other hand, came alone, perhaps to be so damn dedicated to the task I asked of him to play the piano for the affair. I shook my head. He hadn't changed at all.
My dear friend Teru was up on his feet by the first row on the right. He was talking to his son Keiji who looked as dignified as his dad in a white tuxedo. Lucky bastard, that younger Kobashi is, I thought, snorting. He was the one I'd be losing her to. But I hadn't meant that in a derogatory way. If she'll be happy with him, then it's fine with me. But should he lay a finger on her, he'd have to answer to me. If he ever dared to hurt her, I'd whack my most expensive guitar on his face to extreme unrecognition--both the guitar and his face.
My morbid thoughts and waiting were intermitted by the soft clicking of heels against the marble floor. I forgot everyone inside as I averted my attention to her. "Hi," I greeted, trying not to notice her eyes were red and a bit puffy behind the veil covering her face. "Ready?"
"You didn't give me a chance to speak," she said, coming straight to the point.
"Sorry." I meant it. But I also meant the stolen opportunity for her to have her say.
"But I have something to tell you, too. Not quite a mouthful though, but I hope it's enough to send my point across."
I nodded in resignation, facing my fears. "Alright.'
"You are important to me, and it's much more than you think you are. I'll never deny the fact that you are the first man I've ever come to love, and the only man I'll love as much as I do now. I've always been proud of you and I'd never want you any other way. You are the first man in my life, and you always will be."
Those were the sweetest words she, or anyone else, had ever said straight at me. I pressed my quivering lips to her forehead and kissed her. I felt her arms wrap around me and the subtle shaking of her shoulders as she sobbed. Once again, although she'd heard it more than once, I said the very words I've always told her.
"I love you, Luna."
"I love you, too, Daddy."
An hour later, my precious Luna Sugihara became Mrs. Keiji Kobashi.
18 December 2000, 3:09 AM
Author's Note:
This fic probably doesn't make any sense at all. I just toyed with the idea of Sugizo being the father of the bride, after knowing how much he loves his daughter so much. I find that truly endearing so much so that it prompted me to wonder how Sugizo would seem in such a position. You've got to admit, it would be nice to winder how things would go. Some of the lines supposedly delivered by Sugizo came from the translated version of his open letter to his fans to tell them about Luna. The feelings that poured out with every word he uttered melted my heart. That's when I felt how much he loves his daughter enough to give her his own life.
This piece was inspired by the J-rock band Luna Sea [these guys here] and it is, by far, the only Luna Sea fic I wrote. What followed was a string of Glay fanfiction.
You would also have to forgive me for the way I write. I never considered myself as a very good writer. My only purpose in writing--at least during my fanfic-writing days--was to make my friends happy.
I haven't written anything lately. I hope posting my fics here would help me get back on my writing.
====================
Losing Her
Shiira Megumi
Today my heart thumped loudly from within my chest, much wilder than it did before any of the sold-out concerts I've given out with my band-my former band. Nothing I've done in the past could have prepared me for this moment. Sure, the idea might have crossed my mind a few times before, but nothing beats reality. And reality is here, slapping my face, tormenting me along with mixed emotions already swimming in my head and heart.
I knocked on the door and her faint yet sweet voice came muffled from inside. I took one deep breath before I turned the knob to let myself in.
Her face lit up as soon as she saw my reflection on the mirror. With a smile, she got up from the dresser chair and spins around to meet my eyes. "Well...how do I look?"
I smiled, beaming. "Like the gorgeous girl you've always been." It was a simple line yet it took all of my guts to say it. I almost even choked on it. Gorgeous was putting it simply. She is so beautiful it's far beyond words. She was dressed in a white off-shoulder number of satin, tulle, and beads, the princess-cut bodice hugging her shapely torso, the full skirt making her appear like a heroine out of the fairy tale book she'd always been fond of reading. The diamond-studded tiara sitting daintily atop her head proved it.
I stifled a chuckle as I remembered when I'd worn a similar albeit unimpressive dress a few years back during one of our concerts, way before I even met her. Had she seen me then, she probably would've laughed me off the stage. After all, I was then already in my late twenties, at the time when I basked in the long peak of my career as lead guitarist of Luna Sea, the greatest rock band of my time. My life then had simply consisted of four elements: music, alcohol, nicotine, and women. I let the smirk triumph over me. I've come a long way since I've met her, haven't I?
Then again, maybe she wouldn't laugh at me silly. She'd always been understanding of everything I did. In fact, it's one of the things I dearly loved about her. How can anyone not feel the same way?
Her face broke into a sly grin. "Hey, you don't look half-bad yourself."
Trust her to always be the first to notice any effort I put into making myself look good, not that I had to exert a lot of it. I had on a white tux ensemble, complete with equally immaculate white leather dress shoes. My hair I wore short and simple and free of any color. It had been that way for years now. I guess I look...normal. Hn, it's one of her favorite words.
"Well, I must not look any worse," I retorted with a playful lift of a brow. "I can't let you have all the attention now, can I? I am the rock star after all."
"Was," she corrected.
The signature bitchy expression on my face wore off to be replaced by a thoughtful, serious smile. "Yes, that's right."
"You don't regret it, do you?"
"No. I still miss it though, to be honest. I mean, it is the band that I've lived for. Bur regret is out of the question. You know I did it for you."
"I never asked you to give it up."
"I know." And it was true. Not once did she demand for me to choose between her and my career. If she had been just any woman, I would've blatantly chosen the band right at her face. But that's not what she is. Besides, the breakup had been a mutual agreement between me and the guys. We've had our moments. It was just agreed that all of us should take time out to attend to the important people that matter in our life more than trying to please others. After all, we've all spent half of our lives doing just that.
She looked down at the floor for a moment. "I almost forgot. Isn't it bad luck for you to see me before the ceremonies."
"I'm not your groom." Those were the hardest words I've ever given out. It was as outright as saying I've lost her.
"I think I'm gonna cry."
"Then cry." Deep inside, I honestly think I should be the one to do just that. She isn't the one about to lose the most important person in her life.
"I'm just deliriously glad. This is the happiest moment of my life."
"Mine, too."
Soft brown eyes regarded me in surprise. "Really?"
"I'm happy if you're happy. You know that."
She nodded with a sniff, I noticed. "Well, I guess it's time to see if this mascara really is waterproof, ne? I shall see you outside then?"
I expelled another puff of air. "Actually, there's something I need to give you before you go out there." I strode towards her, stopping just a few inches away from her. I pulled out a rectangular blue velvet box from my back pocket and handed it to her.
Her eyes grew wide. "This is so beautiful!" she cried, taking the gold necklace from its case. A gloved hand smoothed the huge sapphire pendant hanging elegantly from the chain. "Thank you so much."
"It's nothing." I took the jewelry from her hands and she faced her back to me so I could clasp the chain around her neck. "You know," I began, recalling the speech I've long been practicing before my bathroom mirror, "I don't think I've ever told you how much you mean to me."
"You have," she said. "Lost of times before...when we were together."
"Maybe, but did you know how much I've meant ever single word I've uttered?" I inhaled deeply to cover up the beginnings of nasal drips caused by impending tears and I caught the faint scent of jasmine wafting from behind her ears. I love her wearing that scent.
She didn't say a word and I took it as my cue to go on. "Ever since I've met you, you've become the center of my life. I never thought I could get to feel a love as special as the one I felt with you, but you made it all possible. Since then, everything that I did, I've always done with you on my mind. When Luna Sea broke up, I felt sad and hurt, but in a way I was glad and relieved. I knew it meant spending more time with you. I wanted to be with you at all times, to be there when you need me and even when you don't. I wanted to make up for when I weren't there because I had my career. And at this point, before you march down there and into the arms of the man you've chosen, I just wanted you to know that you are the most important person in my life, and that I love you very, very much. And I'm not saying all these to ask you not to...not to walk down that aisle. I'm just...stating a difficulty."
She spun around to face me, her eyes brimming with tears threatening to fall at any given moment. I would love to see them trickle down her pretty face but a knock came at the door I've stupidly left open.
"There you guys are! We've been searching all over for you," a middle-aged but still suave-looking Ryuichi exclaimed by the doorway. Bless him, always right on time. "You ready?"
"Yes," I replied. I threw her a hurried glance. "I'll see you outside." Then I quickly headed for my way out without waiting for her response. I guess I was afraid of what she'd say. She's young, only twenty-two, but she'd never feared to say what was in her heart. I may be more than twice her age, and I've yet to feel as comfortable spilling out whatever I keep, although that did change somehow a few years back.
To be honest, a lot of things did change about me when I met her. When all I cared about was my stereotypical rock star status, she came into my life and, as Ryuichi himself said, I've been different since. For the better. I used to be so selfish, thinking there was nothing more important to me but myself and the band. But I changed after I realized I was crazy about her. She'd changed me without meaning to. She just simply had to be there.
But after today has gone, she's going to change my life all over again, almost as she'd alter hers. She still has her whole life ahead of her, a new one. I, however, could not bear to think life without her, if I could still call it life at all. I'm about to lose the woman I've ever loved as much. How could anyone call that living?
I poked my head inside the cathedral to see everybody settled into his seat. Almost all of the guests had arrived and I can't help but smile. Things sure changed a lot after about two decades. My friends and former bandmates were all present at the left side of the chapel. Inoran was seated comfortably in the second row beside his pretty wife and their equally good-looking youngest son. J, still the self-avowed bachelor, was in the same row, murmuring something to his current flame, a former commercial model. Shinya looked as healthy as he was during our last concert, his wife absent for a CM shoot in Europe. Ryuichi was by the window and busy chatting up with the members of the new band he was producing.
Other noted people were present as well, famous almost at the same time we were. The man partly responsible for our fame as Luna Sea, Yoshiki was seated at the back beside a pretty blonde with a noticeable huge diamond solitaire on her left middle finger. So he had finally broken his pledge of bachelorhood...after twenty-five years! A gentle laugh diverted my gaze to the right side of the chapel where the members of L'Arc~en~Ciel were, their frontman Hyde as good-looking as a man as ever. I think their band had lasted the longest among their contemporaries, one of which included mine, although Haido had taken on a lot of solo projects a few years after he got married. Luna Sea weren't in speaking terms with Laruku before, but time had definitely mellowed down the rivalry. I smirked as I saw their bassist smile. Tetsu seemed like wine, getting better with age. I seemed to remember he looked handsomer today than he did the last time I saw him, which was always the case.
The members of Glay were here, too, not that it's a shocker. Jiro was seated at the second row, right side, along with his pregnant yet still beautiful wife. In three months, she'll be going into her fifth labor. Hisashi-chatting with Jiro believe it or not-has taken on a more masculine appearance since Glay made their final bow years before L'Arc~en~Ciel did. He came with his wife-his second after a nasty divorce from his first. She had recently given birth to their second child, a daughter who's an exact image of Hisashi. Takuro, on the other hand, came alone, perhaps to be so damn dedicated to the task I asked of him to play the piano for the affair. I shook my head. He hadn't changed at all.
My dear friend Teru was up on his feet by the first row on the right. He was talking to his son Keiji who looked as dignified as his dad in a white tuxedo. Lucky bastard, that younger Kobashi is, I thought, snorting. He was the one I'd be losing her to. But I hadn't meant that in a derogatory way. If she'll be happy with him, then it's fine with me. But should he lay a finger on her, he'd have to answer to me. If he ever dared to hurt her, I'd whack my most expensive guitar on his face to extreme unrecognition--both the guitar and his face.
My morbid thoughts and waiting were intermitted by the soft clicking of heels against the marble floor. I forgot everyone inside as I averted my attention to her. "Hi," I greeted, trying not to notice her eyes were red and a bit puffy behind the veil covering her face. "Ready?"
"You didn't give me a chance to speak," she said, coming straight to the point.
"Sorry." I meant it. But I also meant the stolen opportunity for her to have her say.
"But I have something to tell you, too. Not quite a mouthful though, but I hope it's enough to send my point across."
I nodded in resignation, facing my fears. "Alright.'
"You are important to me, and it's much more than you think you are. I'll never deny the fact that you are the first man I've ever come to love, and the only man I'll love as much as I do now. I've always been proud of you and I'd never want you any other way. You are the first man in my life, and you always will be."
Those were the sweetest words she, or anyone else, had ever said straight at me. I pressed my quivering lips to her forehead and kissed her. I felt her arms wrap around me and the subtle shaking of her shoulders as she sobbed. Once again, although she'd heard it more than once, I said the very words I've always told her.
"I love you, Luna."
"I love you, too, Daddy."
An hour later, my precious Luna Sugihara became Mrs. Keiji Kobashi.
18 December 2000, 3:09 AM
Author's Note:
This fic probably doesn't make any sense at all. I just toyed with the idea of Sugizo being the father of the bride, after knowing how much he loves his daughter so much. I find that truly endearing so much so that it prompted me to wonder how Sugizo would seem in such a position. You've got to admit, it would be nice to winder how things would go. Some of the lines supposedly delivered by Sugizo came from the translated version of his open letter to his fans to tell them about Luna. The feelings that poured out with every word he uttered melted my heart. That's when I felt how much he loves his daughter enough to give her his own life.
I wrote this fic a few days-a week and a day to be exact-before Luna Sea's Final Act Tokyo Dome concert and as of this moment, no one but Luna Sea and the gods know of they'll ever get back together again, which is why I've made that little detail a bit vague.
Some clarification is in order:
- Haido - is the romanized [Japanese words written in roman letters] form of Hyde, L'Arc~en~Ciel's lead vocalist
- Laruku - shortened romanized form of L'Arc~en~Ciel
As this is a fanfiction, all standard fanfic disclaimers apply, yada, yada, yada...you all know the drill. And yes, for the umpteenth time, I own none of the characters I've mentioned, though I truly wish all the men are mine, including the father of the bride.
